Love Who Matters, You
Revamp your love life, by first loving yourself! It’s that easy. 
Many approaches we use to date or sustain our love relationships just might be built on some outmoded principles. According to well-renowned author, psychotherapist, and life coach, Lauren Mackler, the key to a successful ‘love’ life is about first looking within. She discusses in her new book, Soul Mate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life that the premise for most of us seeking an intimate partnership is to look outside ourselves first. It is this natural inclination that can lead us astray and possibly to the ever-revolving doors of relationships.
The key to success is to first take inventory within. You could start by evaluating the ‘common themes’ in past relationships. By highlighting relationship patterns, it could help in understanding areas that have yet to be master. Ask, where can I grow, heal or forgive myself? Her book walks you through a self-exploration process that identifies how you can be a full, integrated, independent and financially secure person on your own and thus loving who you are from within! Remember, how you ‘feel’ about ‘you’ is the image that you project and therefore, use to attract the partner you want. If this image of you is not aligned with the ‘whole’ you, then you could be attracting the wrong match!
You must first become the partner that you seek. –Lauren Mackler, Soul Mate: Mastering The Art of Aloneness, Transforming Your Life
The old paradigm of expecting our partner to ‘make’ us happy, fulfilled, secure and valued is holding us back from being whole. We are relying on someone else to sustain us when we haven’t first done the work to build the skill around loving ourselves. It goes back to the phrase, “feed a man a fish and he eats for one night. Teach him to fish and he is fed for a lifetime.” When we seek love first outside ourselves it will never truly fulfill us because we will always need more. Although, if we learn to look in the mirror and first love ourselves and do the work, then love will be the experience at every moment. It will no longer be something we are seeking, but simply being. I challenge you to reflect and identify the areas that you might need to develop to FIRST love yourself! LIVE.LOVE.LUX.
Tagged in: relationships, love, partnerships, love yourself, lauren mackler, soul mate book, self-reflection, self-ownership,
