The 9 Habits of Successful Couples
Make your relationship even better
Healthy relationships have many things in common. Find out from our relationship experts what you and your partner should do to strengthen your connection.
Successful couples frequently use humor to neutralize conflicts and disagreements. They are playful with each other to bring arguments to a quick end, said Dr. Jane Greer, a relationship expert.
Don’t take it personally if your partner says “no”
They're open and sensitive of their partner's moods so they don't take it personally if their partner is not "in the mood" on a particular day. Instead, they plan and look forward to another time when they will/can be intimate, Dr. Greer said.
Fight to fix the problem
Healthy couples fight to see their partner’s point of view, to understand their feelings, and to work towards a solution. Arguments in a relationship should not be viewed negatively because they help build an understanding with your significant other. Communicating during a disagreement helps create intimacy, connection, and trust, said Lori Bizzoco, founder of CupidsPulse.
Negative comments can be discouraging. They can even cause a partner to not want to fix the problem. Healthy couples focus on communicating with their partner about what they want instead of what they don’t want. This approach makes the other person eager to address an issue and prevents them from getting defensive, Bizzoco said.
In a healthy couple, one person will throw away their pride to make their spouse or partner happy. By doing so, they view apologies as a way to overcome problems as a couple, not simply a way to make a fight disappear, Bizzoco said.
Don't go to bed angry
You may have heard it over and over again, but in order to have a healthy relationship, you need to fix problems whenever they arise, even it's late and you just want to go to sleep. It'll be so much easier to move on if you address it immediately instead of getting angrier and letting the issue brew overnight, Bizzoco said.
Voice your frustrations
Keep an eye out for resentment and if it's building up, communication is key. Walking around upset and angry at your spouse for what they did or didn't do and not talking about it can crush a relationship. A healthy relationship is one where frustrations can be voiced and discussed and addressed. Avoiding the issues just allows the pressure to build and damage to occur, said Megan Bearce, a family and relationship therapist.
Ask for help
In today's fast-paced world we are expected to do more and be more available than ever. Whether it's work, kids activities, or caring for aging parents, these demands can take their toll on a couple emotionally. Asking friends, family, or neighbors for help when times get stressful is an important piece of self-care and if you are less overwhelmed, you are more available for the relationship, Bearce said.
Foster a hobby or activity separate from each other
Maintaining one’s identity away from their partner is a healthy thing. By doing so you are building a network of support, relaxing, and recharging for when you and your partner are back together. Being a couple doesn't mean you have to be together 24/7, Bearce said.